Escaping the madness

I left the madness and can't find the strength to continue the story.
But that's OK. 


Just like memories, a body will shut out, or shut down when the limit is reached. Seems I've reached my limit for today.
Telling one of the secrets about my precious mamma is enough for today.
Never got near the the goal I set out to reach but there are plenty of tomorrows.


It would seem so easy to just run as fast as I can up the slippery slope, spill it all, be healed and live.
I don't want to journey, I want to be at the finish line. I want it all over.


But I'm no quitter. 


I just quit for today").




No pancakes?
No problem, I'm used to eating alone.

I'm going to escape now, play some music, share some music and maybe if I'm really feeling adventurous I may unlock my door and walk into the cool morning. If not, Bejeweled here I come :).


"When She Loved Me" sarah mclachlan
http://youtu.be/A3qBbLyRixg

"When somebody loved me,
  Everything was beautiful.
  Every hour we spent together,
  Lives within my heart.


  And when she was sad,
  I was there to dry her tears.
  And when she was happy so was I.
  When she loved me.


  Through the summer and the fall,
  We had each other that was all.
  Just she and I together,
  Like it was meant to be.


  And when she was lonely,
  I was there to comfort her.
  And I knew that she loved me.


  So the years went by,
  I stayed the same.
  But she began to drift away.
  I was left alone.
  Still I waited for the day,
  When she'd say "I will always love you"


  Lonely and forgotten,
  Never thought she'd look my way,
  And she smiled at me and held me,
  Just like she used to do.
  Like she loved me,
  When she loved me.


  When somebody loved me,
  Everything was beautiful,
  Every hour we spent together,
  Lives within my heart,
  When she loved me."




I've been holding on to this song for months.
It's so foreign to the way I believed that it was sacrilege to even listen to the whole song the first time I found it. I shook my head and turned it off.
My faith has been shaken to the bare roots, and I've asked all these questions, but I can't deny what's real. And I know that I know that before the world shook the hell out of me (the fear of hell that is), before a perfect storm drowned me and laid a ship upon my chest, He was real.
Not just real to others but personal to me. Miracles in my body, mind and soul can never be refuted, but as our pastor so aptly put it, "If I were God, I'd do things different. If I were God, I'd show off more.".
I agree. 
He is real, I believe, I know He will never leave me or forsake me.
But I just don't get it anymore. I want to know "why?".


"Dear God" sarah mclachlan
http://youtu.be/FrueVp_kuZ8


Now let's have a little fun!
Just discovered this great lady from Dublin, Ireland.
Love her style, love her clothes. 
A whole lot of vintage with a whole lot of now = WOW!!!


"Johnny Got A Boom Boom" imelda may
http://youtu.be/ZucJAkzCNq8

Visit her website for some great video. Watch the filming of Psycho and others for a real treat. Her accent is heavy but she's fun.
Thought this one would be a good place to call it a day.
If you go with me, you "go with a phyco" "). elle


"Psycho" imelda may
http://youtu.be/2yhsVLdmtKI

"Keep on takin' your medication
  Lock that temper behind those pills
  Your brain in flyin', insanely fryin'
  Just remember it's bad to kill


  I go with a psycho 
  I go with a psycho


  No more growlin', Stop your prowlin'
  Leave those cars and people alone
  You're an animal, a human cannibal
  Snarlin' and snappin' like a dog on a bone


  I go with a psycho
  Yeah, I go with a psycho


  You terrify the neighbors when you scream and shout
  You look like it's contagious, you're foaming at the mouth
  You're a freakin' nightmare, when you're lyin' in my bed
  You sleep with eyes wide open like the living dead
  
  I go with a psycho
  I go with a psycho"